Fried Food is not my Friend

I took the kids to the County Fair yesterday afternoon. 

I am still tired.

It could be because The Girl made me go with her on rides that should be illegal for 35 year old housewife.  I mean really, what in the world possessed me to go onto a ride that requires you to lay on your stomach and then spin around in a circle for three minutes.  

Y'all, I can't even ride the Merry-Go-Round without getting queasy, but there I was, riding face down, willing myself to keep from ralphing. Not because I hate to throw-up more than going to the dentist (because I do), but throwing up while already in a completely unattractive position would have been humiliating. I could feel gravity pulling the wrinkles on my face as I was spinning.  

But The Girl is a lover of the scary rides and The Mister wasn't with us to be the scary ride chaperone. Paw (my Dad) was there, but he was only there to do that thing that grandparents do: fill 'em up with sugar, love on them, and leave.  No, no, he actually walked and visited the animals with us and had some lunch. He even held my bag and took some pictures while I tried my darndest to act as if I was a young hip mom who loves to ride coasters all while looking great. Like when I ....

... went on the water log ride and managed to get my backside completely soaked.  Try looking hip when your rear is all wet. However, on an arid, 7% humidity day like yesterday, it took precisely three minutes and 42 seconds to be completely dry, including my chonies. 

Anyway, today I am reaping the consequences of eating a corn dog, cotton candy, and funnel cake. Oh! And there was also a bite of a fried Twinkie in the mix, which brings me to my next subject...

A couple years ago, back in the day when we had cable, The Boy and I were die hard Unwrapped fans. One afternoon there was an entire episode dedicated to Fair Foods. It was during this time of mother/son bonding that The Boy made up his mind that he would someday find a fried Twinkie and eat it. All. By. Himself.

Now, I was curious about the fried Twinkie myself, only because I had heard people rave about it over the years. Honestly, last year I intentionally skipped the area where the fried cookies and candies were sold because I was still weighing out the caloric options.  I don't even like Twinkies. Would it be worth all those calories?

(For those of you who would rather not know the nutritional data of the fried Twinkie, don't click this link.)

Yesterday, with The Boy being ten years old and all, I decided this would be the year for his dream to come true.  Also, I could have a small bite and taste, first hand, if the Big Broo-haha over the fried Twinkie was everything Fair Food Foodies say it is.  Whew! Now that was a sentence!

Please don't hate me, but the fried Twinkie? Not so much.

The Boy on the other hand thought he was in food heaven, but he is, of course, a ten year old boy.  He's like a goat. A busy, growing, tween-age, goat.  He'll eat anything if it is fried, sugar-filled and horrible for you, and he'll be hungry again before you can say Gravitron.  

On the other hand it was fun to give him his childhood dream for $3.75.  I have a feeling that in a few years his hopes and dreams are going to get more expensive. But i digress...

Let's talk about what I would totally, and completely, spend my hard earned calories on:

Well first there is this.  Then maybe that. And of course there is this.

How about you? Are you a Fried, Fair Food, Fanatic? 

No? Then what is your substitute? Please don't tell me carrot juice.  I'm trying to digest yesterdays corn dog.

Happy Friday!