Taking My Own Advice

It always happens around this time of year.

I get asked for homeschooling advice.

This flatters me and makes me scared all at the same time.

What makes me nervous is when I hear: You must be so organized... You always have it all-together. Or more recently, You seem like you're a pro!


Oh that those things were true!

But they aren't.

Which is why I get twitchy.

Unfortunately my response to this young mom was probably not what she was expecting, and in re-reading my reply, was more vague than I intended.

Homeschooling isn't half as romantic as I thought it would be, but its ten-fold the blessing, which I never expected! Remember that some days are going to be AWESOME! And some, well, they're just gonna be hard and you'll wonder if your kids will end up dumb as stumps... but its ALL worth while!

 I think its great that you are going to homeschool! As far as advice... practice grace - with yourself, with your kids. Expect things to take less time and more time, all at once! Remember that home education is not like traditional schooling... your kids will learn so much more than their A-B-C's, things that cannot be measured or tested, and many won't understand...but that that is OK! 

Prayer is the one thing that gets you through, and the first thing you'll set aside... pursue prayer! You can't live without it! (that is true for traditional or home education!)  

What I should have said was this:

On more days than not every table in the house is covered with something...

it might be books,

or laundry,

or (many) unfinished projects.

(I act like it doesn't bother me... often it does.)

There are usually clean dishes left drying on the stove top (which is a terrible place to dry your dishes... but I do it anyway.)

... not to mention open cupboards and popcorn on the floor.

Organization happens, but it isn't done quickly, and is often done in short increments of time over many days... like this pile of new school supplies that have been laying in the hall way.

Most days... I can't find my red pen (even though I have a dozen):

I don't often wear make-up when school keeps us at home,

... but I wear a furrowed-brow more than I should...

You may have to click on the picture to see the furrow-ness... it's there, I promise.

I'm impatient.

Quick to assume the worst.

I fail to see the good things when there is so much good to be seen.

I make schedules that I can't always keep.

My projects often don't work.

I waste precious time on things that aren't important.

But the biggest mistake I make every blessed day?

I forget that I am called to this gig with dual purpose... I am not to simply teach my kids, but to train them. Teaching is when I impart my knowledge (or that of the text in front of me) and it is important.


But training is when I come along side them and actively help them  to "develop habits, thoughts and behavior by discipline and instruction" and it requires (a lot of) time, (a lot of) grace, and (a lot of ) repetition.

Training is often where I fail.

Time, grace and repetition are places in which I am the most greedy, the most selfish... and its what my children need of me the greatest.

I am quick to compare, and slow to prayer.

Oh! the struggle is fierce in this place, not just in my role as a mother and an educator, but personally as well.

In the midst of all that is imperfect, I forget to be thankful.

I stumbled across a blog post this week that expressed much more eloquently what I was trying to say...

When we give thanks, we gain joy. All of us. These daily lessons looking for grace is the way we see God even here.

Because what will the math really matter if they are bitter? If the house is immaculate — but my attitude a mess? If they can count — but they don’t know how to count all things as joy? If we get the lists done, but have lost happiness in Him? How can any grammar skill outweigh the fact they don’t know the language of grace and thanks? What good will it be if they can recite all the major British battles — but they don’t know to see beauty? What am I teaching our children if I’m not living simply, quietly this: “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things” (Phil. 4:8). Focusing on what is beautiful, good, true –isn’t this the truest education? - Ann Voskamp

Ultimately I want my students, my children, to learn what they need to know to be successful in life, but if I do not train them to see the Joy in life, to see passed the to-do lists and the syllabus, then I have failed them. Those things are chaff on the wind, here today and gone tomorrow, they add nothing to the value in the hearts of my children. Or mine!

If I'm honest I must tell you that I struggle with these things. I want the romance of homeschooling, and I am surprised when it is not. I want the facade of the clean house and perfect kids, but it just doesn't exist.

This is my homeschooling reality. Its my life.  And you know what? Its been an amazing experience for our kids, our family, for me.

Still looking for advice?

Me too.

This morning I'm right here with you. Refilling a prescription to my own medicine:


The romance of homeschooling is in the hindsight vision... but the joy of homeschooling is giving thanks in advance.

May I live this out in the coming year.

Little Yellow Schoolhouse: 2011-2012

Well, its official.

The Little Yellow Middle School is open.

First year without any elementary aged children... and it feels weird. If you have preteens/teen in the house you know what I mean.

For the record, I am enjoying this age and stage with my kids. I know a lot of people don't consider these awkward middle school years their "favorite." I get it, I do. But, I think this stage is kind of fun; most certainly, its funny.

Yesterday, I took the obligatory first day of school photos.

The Girl, who is VERY excited to be starting school again was up and dressed and ready to go.

It just goes to show that wether schooled traditionally or home-educated, fashion is still of utmost importance to the preteen girl.

The Boy, isn't quite ready to be back...

He asked me to take pictures of him looking sad/mad about going back to school.....

He couldn't keep it up for very long... he's a smiler, that Boy. (He's is looking so much like my youngest brother these days... its kind of spooky!)

So there they are the 2011-2012 middle school class.

One sixth-grader.

One eighth-grader.

One teacher.

Living on a wing and prayer.

Scathingly Brilliant Idea (and it wasn't even mine)

She wants everything to be blue.

I'm not sure why.

I mean, since the moment I knew she was a girl-child I bought-up every pink hair bow and outfit I could find.

Maybe its 'cuz I painted her nursery and several rooms pink without even asking. 

Maybe its 'cuz blue is the farthest you can get away from pink.

 I don't know. I just know she's all about the color blue.

Blue.

Blue hair streaks, blue bedroom walls, blue curtains.


She likes her blue.

I still dabble in pink here and there - in fabric, in yarn - but I've learned that where The Girl is concerned its better to allow her own style shine through. However, when she came to me and told me that she wanted to paint the table her Poppa built for her over a decade ago in her favorite color.... I. just. couldn't. do it.

She loves that table. I tried to convince her that she should get a desk to match her bed and dresser. That toddler size table doesn't quite fit anymore. But she doesn't want to give it up. Not yet... she just wants it to be blue.

So, I was thinking of how could we change the color without permanent damage when The Girl approached me with a scathingly brilliant idea!

(ten points if you can name the movie that quote comes from...its one of my favorite movies (and quotes!))

Nowadays duct tape comes in all sort of fashions and colors. She figured we could cover the table with tape and someday, if she ever loves the color pink purple. We could change it. Or if she will ever allow me to haul it out of her room for a bigger desk and chair, I can uncover the blue tape, take some alcohol wipes to the duct tape stickiness, and have a white table for the grandkids to play on in the (longtime) future.

And, in the pitch that won the game she said, "Its like a craft project we could work on together!"

That Girl, she knows me.

How could I say no?

We bought the tape and rushed home.

We wiped down the table and let it dry. Then we turned it over and started with the legs. This part was more difficult for her to do on her own without the tape bunching up (it was difficult for me too) so she worked on another project until I could get that done.

Then we turned it over and started with the top.

The whole process took about an hour. And we didn't have to prime or clean paint brushes after!

The Girl and I were so excited about it that we are trying to figure out how to do the chairs as well---although honestly, they look overwhelming with all their spindles and curves.

Maybe. Maybe chairs...

We decided to do the legs and trim in silver to give it that 50s formica feel.

She loves it.

And I may have a new crafting obsession...

When The Mister came home and saw our completed project he applauded our efforts in that quiet way he has -- I looked at him with a twinkle in my eye and said, "Yeah! what else do you think needs covering with tape?!"

To which he chuckled and said, "Uh oh. Here we go again..."

At $3.50 a roll, its the cheapest of craft supplies I own!

Happy Friday!

Birds of a Feather

Weeks ago I read a blog post that solved my Great Dilemma.

I have a daughter who is cultivating a two-year fascination with mermaids.

Two years ago we saw a movie called Aquamarine about a mermaid of the blonde persuasion who had a lovely blue streak in her hair.

This little blue lock of tress made quite an impact on my (then) nine-year old and the campaign for azure adornment was born.

For two years she was denied.

Just when she had nearly worn me down I came upon this post and instantly I knew: Feathers were the answer.

So I did what any mom of a tween-ager does: I Googled it.

Within days I had The Girl sitting in a posh salon where, for three-minutes and twenty-bucks, you could have your blue streaks... and your feathers too. It's quick, and easy, and best of all not permanent.

I watched the stylist put this thing in her hair and the mantra I have on a day-to-day basis began to chant in my head: I could make do this!

All it took was a feather, some hair, a small crochet hook, a pair of pliers and a special bead to attach it with...I had everything but the feather and bead.

So I came home and ordered some.

They've been sitting on my bathroom counter for a couple of weeks.

One of the great joys of my life is to think up things to do and say that will make my kids laugh.

Yesterday morning after drying my hair I had a brilliant idea: put one of those dark feathers in your hair and see how long it takes for the kids to notice.


(This was going to be WAY more fun than that time I put googly eyes on their toothbrushes.)

As I was putting in my purple plumes I had a flashback to my college days when I had come home and was searching for snack in my parents kitchen. My dad walked in and asked about my day, when i looked up he had a small gold-ball piercing... in his nose.

In the moments that passed (that felt like hours) I contemplated my response... this was the man who told my brothers that if they ever came home with a pierced ear they better be wearing a dress. This was the man who had long let us know that his preference was that we keep our tattoos and piercing down to a minimum... but here he was with a ring in his nose.

But before I could say anything he started to laugh in the quiet way my daddy does... laughing, laughing laughing... while I wondered if he was having a crises. Oh, he was tickled with himself.

Turns out he had found a magnetized earring and bought it. Hours later I was in my room studying when I heard my brother walk in the front door and say, "Dad! What is that in your nose?!?!"

And the laughing commenced... still makes me laugh today.

All feathered and ready I ran downstairs waiting for someone (anyone!) to find it.

They are subtle...

Nobody noticed until late in the night and by that time I had forgotten.

They laughed (a little), and declared it looked "cool."

I guess for big laughs nose-rings are best.

I had decided I would take them out, but The Boy said, "Why mom? I think they look nice." So I am going to keep them for a day or two... or at least until co-op starts in September.

Who knows? Maybe I'll start a trend with all the other housewives and home-educators. You know what they say.....birds of a feather.

~~~~~~~

PS: It was recently brought to my attention that I make a "funny scrunchy-face." When I asked The Mister if this was true he said, "Oh yeah, that's classic Kellie."  So Becky, this is for you:

Never Smile at a Crocodile...

The words to that old Disney song are true: 

Don't be taken in by his welcome grin, 

He's imagining how well you'd fit within his skin.

But my Crocodile is the friendly-sort of crocodile.

I'll prove it: 

He does dishes...

He folds laundry...

He keeps me company while working-out and surfing the net...

The best thing of all? He's agreed to do all my lesson planning for the rest of the year.

No crocodile tears here...

Oh yeah, and he's a vegetarian. Good thing my tomatoes are a-plenty in the garden these days.

Would YOU like to have your own friendly crocodile? 

Of course you would! 

Click on over to the Cult of Crochet. I found this post yesterday and immediately started to work. She has written an excellent tutorial for a Crocodile Scarf. This was my "prototype". Which is fancy way of saying: The compulsive crafter that lives in me had to make that crocodile ASAP!, so I started without any thought to having enough yarn to complete it. (Which is why he is only a foot and half long and has a different colored snout)

Instead of scarf he's just a friendly crocodile...

unPopular

The young people in this house aren't happy.

Well, I should say that the oldest child in this house isn't happy, but I think he's gonna live.

Late Saturday evening I was doing my yearly calendar count trying to figure out how the school-year was going to play out. I like to get 180 days of school in each year. This year we will travel to AZ in the fall for a couple weeks and have will VIP visitors in the New Year.

The good news?

With the holidays listed above and Christmas and Spring break we get to take nearly five weeks of vacation this school year, and still finish by the third week of May. 

The bad news?

School starts next week.

So there is a bit of mopey-ness going on around here.

My favorite part of starting school?

School supplies.

I am a serious office product junkie.... serious.

But who can resist a new red pen, a fun folder, or a set of post-it notes in an array of colors?

Not me, that's who.

Secretly, the switch has flipped for me - eight weeks ago I was so done with school. Now I am ready to get back at it. Ready to have some routine.

Which makes me very unpopular.

The great news? The pool will still be open through August so we can count swimming as PE class.

Silver-linings... sometimes they aren't so hard to see.

I just have to convince the kiddos.

Making, Doing, and Thinking: A Rambling Post

My apologies to those who visit the blog because I make things.

I know you have been sorely disappointed.

I've been so busy, you know. Laying around at the pool and chatting with girl-friends is seriously hard work.

Actually, this summer has been busy, but its been wonderful.  Its been a time to lay aside the fabrics and yarns to sit face-to-face with people I love. To pour tea, to laugh, to listen... to reconnect, heart-to-heart and enjoy the making and keeping of friends.

I have also enjoyed time to be with my kids... as their mom, apart from the role of educator. Its the same (after all ALL moms are their child's first and primary teacher in life!), and yet, so very different. I sometimes miss it during the school-year.

As a family we've had  a lot of cooking-out...

and eating al fresca... on the deck, yet in the Ring of Fire.

We have five citronella candles on the deck that we light. Its a win-win: they add ambiance, and the bugs stay away.

I do have a few projects on-the-hook. I'm in the middle of a Tea Cozy like this one...only in black/red/white. I'll be sure to post pics when its finished (its hard to photograph black yarn.)

I  had need of some color last night, so I took a black-yarn break and started this real quick before I went to bed....

I'm not sure what this will be, nor what I will do with it... but playing with my favorite colors makes me happy.

I've also been baking: banana bread, carrot-cake cookies, and bread.

I tried my hand at some Five Minute Artisan Bread...mine didn't turn out quite as pretty. But The Mister, said, "This is delicious, did you make it? It tastes like its from the bakery!" Which, as you can imagine, made me very happy...  Hopefully the next batch will look like it was from the bakery too.

My poor neglected garden is so sad. The rabbits ate all my cucumber, and my bell peppers have been poorly from the get-go.  But the tomatoes love this North Carolina heat. I picked three red ripe 'mater's yesterday, and ate them before I could take their picture.

I also had two green ones fall to the ground before their time. If I was a bettin' gal, I would say I see Fried Green Tomatoes in my future. (Can you believe I've lived in the south for nearly 15 years and have never had a fried green tomato?) Anybody got a good recipe?

My bee-lady (aka - local honey supplier - who is also my fresh chicken egg's lady) brought me a dozen yesterday.

I know they are just eggs... but look at how beautiful they are! You can't tell from the picture, but the white ones in the back row are actually blue. They are so fresh there is still a feather on one. Can you see it?

I haven't been as creative in the office this summer, but there has been more room to stretch, to think deeply, to ponder, to read.

This week I have been pondering this old hymn. The words are just so beautiful. So True.

May the mind of Christ my Savior

Live in me from day to day,

By His love and pow'r controlling

All I do and say.

May the Word of Christ dwell richly

In my heart from hour to hour,

So that all may see I triumph

Only through His pow'r.

May the peace of Christ my Savior,

Rule my life in everything,

That I may be calm to comfort

Sick and sorrowing.

May the love of Jesus fill me,

As the waters fill the sea;

Him exalting, self abasing, 

This is victory.

May I run the race before me, 

Strong and brave to face the foe, 

looking only unto Jesus

As I onward go.

The fourth verse is my favorite...

Summer... you are more than half-way through. Onward I go...making, doing, thinking.... stretching.  It all makes me happy.

What We'll Do For Love

Young love is foolish.

Apparently, old love is too.

Eighteen years ago I had a summer romance.

At first it was a glance, then a few spoken words, and soon we were holding hands and taking walks and spending time together.


When the days began to shorten and the air began to chill we knew we were in love, but we wouldn't admit it to each other.

Yes, there were love notes and picnic/dinners in the park, but by far the craziest thing I did for love was to wake up at 4:30 am to beat him to the gym.

You see, I knew he got up early to work out. I also had a membership to the same gym (although my favorite part of the gym was the smoothie bar aerobics class.) I certainly had never seen the inside of the building at an hour the birds aren't even awake.

But I had a plan.

I would intentionally get there 10-15 minutes before him, with fixed hair (and the cutest work out clothes I could find) so he would walked in and see my dedicated-self running (all too fast) on the treadmill.

I had the whole conversation worked out in my head -

"I didn't know you worked out this early." he would say.

"Yeah, I like to get it over with. Out of the way." I'd nonchalantly reply, trying to act like my lungs weren't burning in my chest.

He would be so impressed with my dedication, my early morning stick-to-it-iveness... he would like me.

Of course, it never went the way I had imagined. He was surprised but polite, and all business and routine that early in the morning...there wasn't much time for flirting chatting.

Plus, he already liked me. What was I thinking???

Within a couple weeks I realized that my early morning trips to the gym to impress my man were better left to brighter times of day. Getting up that early was hard work! It all worked out though. We declared our love for each other that Christmas and were married 17 months later.

As it turns out that wouldn't be my last early morning trip to the gym.

My mid-morning workout has been lacking since homeschooling put a monkey in the mix....so I started to look for an early morning work out partner.

Turns out I didn't have to look far...

The Mister, also desiring to be more consistent with exercise volunteered to work out with me. So several days a week we are getting up before the roosters to enjoy some early morning time at the gym.


I'm thankful. Thankful for a man who is generous and faithful, with his time and with his heart... as well as easy on the eyes. If you're going to the gym at 5:30 in the morning, its helps to have something nice to look at...

The things you'll do for love.

In the Heat of the Day

A heat wave is coming.

I felt it move in on the wind yesterday, the sun melted anyone standing in its way.

The silently spoken promises of the aqua-colored pool were deceiving - for when you jumped in to be refreshed it was as a lukewarm bath.

It's always at this time of year when I begin to have faint longings for fall.

It isn't like the pining away for warmer days in the dead of winter, when my heart and vision cries out for a glimpse of green. It's more of a nudge, a glimmer, a comfort taken in knowing: the scorching heat that wilts and withers will soon come to an end.

Recently I had a conversation about 'heat' with my daughter.

Life offers up moments when the temperatures of living get hot: a mean person, an awkward moment, a difficult choice. Oh, that I could protect her from the heat that threatens to steal her joy and tempts her to believe that she is left on her own in a vast and thirsty land.


And yet, heat is what refines us and makes us strong.

Still, when life is hot we look for shade and feel alone.

The Good news?

God shows up in the heat of the day.

He shelters us.

He cares for us.

He leads us to a living water that never fails; a water that always cools our brow and quenches our thirst.

Best of all... when we are tempted to despair, when we feel all is lost, when our mouths are dry and we can no longer speak... we can trust in His promise.

Its there, in that promise, I will be waiting... in the heat of this warm summer's day.

Never again will they hunger;
   never again will they thirst.
The sun will not beat down on them,’
   nor any scorching heat. For the Lamb at the center of the throne
   will be their shepherd;
‘he will lead them to springs of living water.’
   ‘And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes.’”
(Revelation 7:16-17)

Saying Good Bye

On Friday morning we woke up from our first, and last, slumber party.

We had had our coffee and a quick bite to eat.

The moving truck was packed. It was time to go.

For the first time in sixteen years it wasn't me who was moving. 

But I was unpacking memories of my own....

I remembered the weeks before our move from Fort Worth. A lady from church encouraged me to be sensitive to those I was leaving behind. She reminded me that I was leaving with my family for a "great adventure" while my friends would have to learn to adjust to life with a Kellie-shaped void.

She was a women I respected and I took her words to heart; tucked them away gently... tiny little pearls I was saving for later... only I didn't know just when.

This was the week-- nearly seven year later.

Things are going to be so strange without my Friday-Lunch Bunch (which this summer turned into an often Wed-Thur-Friday Breaksfast/Lunch Bunch.)

There is a huge void that has settled in the Little Yellow House on The Hill, and its gonna be awfully hard to move around it.

Since there is nothing so well worth having as friends, never lose a chance to make them. 

~Francesco Guicciardini 

Two Posts for the Price of One: Pan Dulce Recipe

(I can't remember the last time I posted twice in one day! But several of you asked for this recipe!)

Yesterday I made Mexican sweet breads called Pan Dulce (or Conchas).  Growing up my dad would buy these (along with Perquitos, and Empanadas) at a Mexican Bakery. We could count on these treats at least twice a year: at tamale time each winter and summer. The Bakery happened to be right next door to the butcher who supplied all the tamale ingredients.

I lived in Texas for 10 years and these little breads were easily found, but when we moved to NC there wasn't a bakery nearby, so I had to learn to make them on my own. I have used this recipe using both my hands and the "dough cycle" on my bread maker (when I wanted to save some time). Either way, they are worth the effort!

Pan Dulce (dome-shaped sweet rolls)


DOUGH
1 tablespoon dry yeast
1 tablespoon sugar
1/4 cup water
3 2/3 cups white bread flour
1 teaspoon salt
1/3 cup sugar
2 tablespoons shortening
5 large eggs, beaten


TOPPING
1/4 cup unsalted butter
1/4 cup shortening
1 cup powdered sugar
1 cup all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon vanilla extract


 For Dough: In a small bowl, dissolve the yeast and 1 tablespoon sugar in warm water.
 Let stand 6-8 minutes.
 In a large mixing bowl, combine 3 cups bread flour, salt, sugar and shortening and blend thoroughly.
Add yeast mixture and 2 eggs.
 Mix completely.
Add remaining eggs and mix.
Add remaining bread flour and mix until the dough forms a loose, soft, and elastic dough.
It should be a little sticky but firm enough to shape easily with buttered hands.
Butter the work surface, and press the dough into a 4x6-inch rectangle, 1 1/2 inches thick.
Cut into 16 medium or 24 small squares.
Cover lightly with plastic wrap for 1 to 1 1/2 hours and let dough rise.
Shape each dough square into a dome-shaped circle.
On a lightly greased cookie sheet, place rolls 2 inches apart.


For Topping: 


In a food processor using a metal blade (i also use my KitchenAide with the paddle attachment and mix until it forms a ball), add the butter, shortening, powdered sugar, 1 cup flour and vanilla.
Process/Mix until smooth,  shape into a log.
Chill until ready to use.
Cut off 2 tablespoons of topping from the log and flatten with palms into a circle.
Place topping circle on top of dough circle.
It should completely cover dough.
Use a sharp knife to cut a crisscross or shell design on top.
Let rolls rise again in a warm place for about 1 to 1 1/2 hours.
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Bake 12-15 minutes until lightly browned.

Mid-Week Musings

It's quiet this morning in the Little Yellow House on the Hill.

A big storm blew through last night and left everything all wet and green.

Here's what it looked like this morning from the back door:

~Since we're outside, shall we stroll through the garden?

~My tomatoes have been doing well in spite of my neglect. Honestly, I've been a terrible garden-keeper this year. I got started late, and then we had a cicada invasion of biblical proportions.  They were the 14 year cicadas and they are a menace to those like me who have a keen sense of hearing. I just couldn't spend a great deal of time outside while they serenaded for mates. 

~Sweet little Sweetpeas...delicious too.

~The kids haven't rolled out of bed yet. As of last night around 9pm The Boy was still running a fever. I'm hoping and praying he wakes up well.

~ A couple weekends ago my friend Becky and I had a craft sale....

Since I was crochet-crazy before the sale, I've taken a small break, but I need to get busy on some custom orders I received.

My favorite part of the craft sale was getting a chance to chat with all our shoppers. It was great to have a bit of time with friends. Tracey stopped by with her oldest K-child. 

We've been reading each others blog for  several years, but only met once! I was so grateful she came by... And what's more, our daughters immediately connected and enjoyed spending time together too!

The Girl also did well at the sale, earning $17.50 selling lemonade and pawning her wares.

She made these barrettes...

... and a bunch of others that were sold!

~ This afternoon is the last swim meet of the season and I can hardly believe that we are already looming on the start of July. This summer is going so quickly!

SUPREMELY Calm

In a cleaning frenzy I found an old spiral-bound notebook from a Spanish class in college.

Its filled with lots of verbs and spanish sentence structure and all the obvious things (as well as an unfinished love note to my then boyfriend (The Mister). But my favorite parts of looking back are the pages where I had obviously copied notes from the board. Notes that were in English.

Although I don't remember this class, nor taking these notes, its safe to assume my professor believed in the power of positive thinking.

The first is dated 1/13/94:

Recognition for Super Learning


I can do it. 
Now I am achieving my goals.
Learning is something I highly enjoy.
Learning and remembering are easy for me.
My mind moves efficiently, effectively.
I am supremely calm.

On January 20 it was test time...

Affirmations for the Test: 
I recognize the right answers at the right time.
I remember all I need to know.
I am supremely confidant.
My memory is alert my mind is powerful.

This just makes me giggle. Not because I don't believe in thinking positively. (I do!) Mostly because I know these weren't my thoughts... nor has my verbiage (then or now) been so harmonious and tranquil.

Today I am choosing to bake some highly enjoyable Mexican pastries... not just because The Boy is sick, making staying home to bake easy for me, but because I can do it, I am achieving my goals, and carbs make me supremely calm.

Change of Plans: for which I am grateful

This day was scheduled to be the start of another week on my own, but in a great turn of events I've got two kids sleeping in their own beds and a full week already planned!

I took the two-hour (one way) drive to get my Girl from camp on Saturday.

It was not an easy week for her, and although she said it wasn't entirely without its fun moments, she promptly declared she wouldn't go again.

Her favorite part of each day was Chapel - she has a notebook full of handwritten notes - she said the teacher was amazing, and she looked forward to going both morning and night. But she said her heart was very sad, because several of her cabin-mates are living very difficult lives- and their attitudes and actions (and often their words) reflect that reality.

She said she spent every day hoping that I had decided to come get her.

She came home with heaviness of heart - burdened in the way any compassionate person should feel, after-all, we live in a broken world. I just didn't expect it to come from a weekend of "fun" camp.

While she was away The Boy was doing drama camp and did amazingly well in his first dramatic play ever...and what's more, he had the best time and met some really fun kids. After hearing about The Girl's experience, he opted to stay home this week and hang out with his friends here in town... and sleep in his own bed. Chances are his experience would have been vastly different - we know his counselor would have been awesome (he's a friend of ours), and unlike The Girl he would have known a couple of the kids. But we also know that his friends here in town mean a lot to him, and often he only gets to see them in the summer. I know he will have just as good a time at home this week.

Secretly (although I am certain it isn't a secret) I'm grateful to have my kiddos home. Our family likes to be together. We always have, and I hope we always will.

Sweet Sunday in Numbers

One... early morning walk with The Mister.

Two...kids in the house.

Three...an excellent message on the third Person of the trinity: The Holy Spirit.

Four... burgers at the newly opened Five Guys.

Five...small things to pick up at Target : dog food, dog cookies, hand soap, cheese sticks, and Klondike bars.

Six...minutes it took before the little snoring sounds started this afternoon. (The Mister, not me.)

Seven...more days until next...sweet Sunday.

- Posted using BlogPress from my trutsy iPad

More Than Many Sparrows

Blogger won't let me post pictures this morning...so I am switching gears.

I had hoped to show you some fun stuff from the craft sale I had last weekend...but I guess I will save that for another day.

I've got birds and lilies on my mind this morning.

Again.

Not much time ever passes before I'm brought back to this: do not worry. God is in control.

Whew! Not the light and fluffy post I envisioned...but its where my heart is today...I'm not sad, actually quiet the opposite... its always the choosing to trust that's the hardest; the resting after the trusting is easy and light. You would think I would choose quickly and move about my day, knowing the outcome will always be what's best...but often I choose what I want, forsaking what I desire. Isn't that the problem of life!?

How about you? What comforts you when thoughts and worry threaten to consume your day?

10 Minute Post: GO!

3:32p

I just brushed my teeth.

My schedule is wonky, and it makes me ambivalent.

I should have shipped all my kids off to everywhere before the craft show or after the 2011-2012 curriculum came in so I could use this time to focus on getting a project done.

Instead I have folded all the laundry, cleaned all the house. Had coffee with a friend. Read a book. Started 10 games of Words with Friends (LaVidaCoffeeGal - if you'd like to play)....and brushed my teeth.

Oh, and I finished off the box of chocolate covered almonds...thank goodness they're gone.


Of course, I have no idea what's for dinner.

But, it doesn't matter because now I am headed out the door, picking up The Boy and headed to the pool...Oh! I'm so excited to see people!

Times up! Gotta go!

3:42p

Un-normal Routine

Today is not normal.

It used to be that I had nearly 7 hours each day to clean house, craft, lunch with the ladies, and blog before I picked up the kids from school and started my afternoon routine.

Homeschooling changed all that.

Since August 11, 2008 I haven't really ever been at home alone during the week.

I'd forgotten.

Forgotten the wonderful quiet...

Forgotten the kitchen that always stayed clean...

Forgotten the way I longed for those kids to come home.

Today I remember.

Yesterday we took The Girl to camp. We helped her set up her bunk, kissed her head, and left her for a week in the woods.

Secretly, I had hoped we would drive two-hours to the top of that hill, and find a dilapidated building with mean people in it so we could turn around and come home and tuck my baby to bed.

Of course, it wasn't.

It's beautiful, and the people were nice... and she's no longer a baby.

Hrmph.

The Boy is gone (during the day) this week as well. I'm so glad he isn't sleeping away this week...but next week is a different story.

I'm determined to use my time wisely.

To enjoy the quiet.

I'm going to do my best to not fill these wide open hours with busy-ness and sounds.

I wrote this post: Don't Blink five years ago....who knew it wouldn't get any easier?

The good news is that I do have a few things planned - both time alone and time with friends - that I am really looking forward to. I purposefully scheduled this day to be wistful and contemplative...but then it's time to buck-up and be done!

Tomorrow I am hoping to get some progress in planning and preparing for a study I am going to do with The Girl starting in July based on the book "Eight Great Dates for Mom's and Daughters: How to Talk About True Beauty, Cool Fashion and....Modesty" by Dannah Greshen.

I'm also going to spend some time cleaning up my office and watching my new favorite show: Larkrise to Candleford. Its from the BBC and honestly, its wonderful. I'm in the end of season two and it gets better and better with each episode!

All right, six hours have passed in this first day alone, and I have one more hour to fold some laundry and go get The Boy!

Ahh! I little piece of normal.

Brown Eyed Girl

I stood at the finish line and watched her struggle.

Her tiny little frame. Her pink bathing suit. Her sweet lanky arms doing their back-stroking best.

In the middle of her lane she flipped to her belly. She still had a long way to go.

Her heat-mates, having finished, stood, teeth chattering at the shallow end of the pool. They were all waiting on her.

In the brevity of a second (but might've felt like an hour) her big brown eyes - water clumping her lashes - carried discouragement and fatigue.

She was in the ocean; the shore too far away.

So we cheered, and we clapped, and we yelled, "You're almost there!" 

And she flipped to her back and pressed on.

The smile on her face when she knew she had finished caused a sting in my eyes that remains there today.

So fatigued, as she was, she needed a boost from the water, but she walked as tall as a smallish swimmer could be...

Encouragement.

We will drowned with out it. 

I stayed by the pool, my stop-watch in hand. My pencil, my score cards, my bottle of water. I recorded the times and cheered on for others, but I was traveling to places on my own stormy sea.

I was remembering days when someone encouraged my efforts, focused my faith, helped me to 'swim-on' when feeling fatigued. Those times were fresh air to my lungs, and cool water when thirsty. It framed the pictures of life I was too ambivalent to see.

I was remembering moments when (apart from my doing) I was privileged to watch encouragement help people I love... to get better, to have confidence, to learn to trust again.

Encouragement lends room for the hard-heart to soften, the broken-heart to find comfort, the hindered-heart to find hope. And last night, as a pool full of parents hollered and cheered, it helped a little brown-eyed girl make it to the finish line.

It helped this brown-eyed girl to remember.

~~~~~~~

God of all healing counsel! 

He comes alongside us when we go through hard times, 

and before you know it, 

he brings us alongside someone else 

who is going through hard times 

so that we can be there for that person just as God was there for us.

2 Cor. 1:4 

(The Message)

La Vida Love

On July 12, 2011 I will celebrate six years of blogging bliss.

It all started with a day of Blueberry picking and big cup of coffee.

I spent many days contemplating the name of this blog, and I finally decided it would be named after my favorite coffee from my favorite store in Fort Worth, TX.

For many years I went to a Thursday morning bible study at Christ Chapel Bible Church and on my way home I would stop at the Central Market for a pound of La Vida Dulce coffee and three (or five) dozen still-hot-from-the-griddle tortillas.

Oh. I miss that place.

I will never forget the afternoon (and I've blogged about this before, but can't find it in the archives) when I went directly to the coffee section and couldn't find the big-bulk barrel of my java junkie joy.

In a panic I chased down the first Foodie I could find (one of their employees) and begged to know the reason for the beverage brush-off.

"Discontinued." she said. As if she hadn't a care in the world.

And she pointed me to another flavor that was good, but not what I wanted.

I hadn't had a cuppa that wonderful brew since.

Oh. I miss that coffee.

Yesterday, as I went to get the mail, I smelled the tell-tale signs that someone sweet had sent me another coffee package. (I have some of the BEST enablers friends in the world who send me coffee from time-to-time....for no reason at all...isn't that amazing?)

I had been warned that there might be a package coming this week, but I really had no idea that the surprise would be so...surprising!

Anyway, I opened the box and smelled the aroma and felt the package like a kid at Christmas and knew it was coffee. A lot of coffee. But I made myself wait until I had hiked up our hill before I ripped open the package.

I couldn't believe what it was....

Two pounds of dark- roasted deliciousness.

The package is BIGGER than our industrial-sized cheese!

I immediately called up my friend and she told me the story of how she managed to special order these beans...and it wasn't easy...and it took a long time.

Oh. I miss that girl.

But, here I am sipping away, and feeling lavishly loved.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Lara, 

"Thank you" isn't enough, but thank you.

I wish, wish, wish we could be sitting together (as we used to do each Tuesday morning)with warm mugs in our hand and good conversation on our lips. 

Oh that I could hug your neck...

love,

Kellie

Just Another Post About Bathing Suits and Chocolate

Will someone please tell me to back away from the chocolate covered almonds?

Seriously, who bought those things anyway?

I'm not talking a small-packet that makes one look dainty. Oh no! Its a big box, the kind you see at The Costco's (as they call it around here.)

It's that same two-pound box of candy I've spent years looking at telling myself we didn't "need" them.

I didn't "need" them, but I bought them anyway. Because I could.

Until yesterday the container sat virtually untouched. 

But SUDDENLY, the Chocolate Covered Almond Monster is awake in me and they're the only sustenance that will see me through. 

Anyway, I didn't call you here today to talk to you about my dietary habits, as wonderful as they are...I've called you here today for reasons that... illude me.  

Yes, I have settled in at this shiny screen and keyboard and my thoughts have dashed from the room.

I blame it on 14 years of trying to have a conversation in the presence of children. I don't believe I've had a conversation that included a complete sentence, much less an entire thought, since that first home-pregnancy test showed up positive. 

Speaking of positive (and since I've forgotten what I've come here for) let me tell you about my new bathing suit. 

Every year I fret and worry about the bathing suit dilemma. 

I know I have no earthly reason to worry. I know all the "right things" to think about myself when it comes to body contentment, but if I am honest (and you know that I do my best to be) I am THE MOST self-conscious person known to women when it comes wearing a bathing suit. (Or anything else that risks the exposure of bun's and thigh's.)

My answer to the dilemma this year was to find a suit that covered the areas that cause me the most grief (be it rational or not) and be D-O-N-E with it. 

So I did.  

Of course I delayed this task by putting off the bathing suit shopping spree for several weeks - and I mustn't fail to mention that when deciding to take on this monumental project, I found knee-jerk pluckiness and decided to take my kids with me. 

I'm telling you, bathing suits make me c-r-a-z-y, with a hefty portion of CRAZY.

While The Boy tried to keep a low profile and texted his friends of the unfairness of being trapped in the ladies department, his sister tried on every old-lady hat that sparkled and shined -and then knocked on my dressing room door every two minutes so I could "see". 

Which made for fun times. 

But with relative ease (in spite of the circumstances) I bought this top and this bottom both from Lands End on sale. 

Y'all its a lot of suit. 

And, in a GREAT turn of events, (are you sitting down?) I bought this bathing ensemble in the cool color of Pool Blue - stepping out of the black-on-black box I've lived in since I was 16, when the Sassy magazine (do you remember Sassy?)  told me that black will make you look skinny. A "guideline" that I hadn't quite realized had become law in my life.  

Yup. I bought that big'ole Pool Blue bathing suit and figured I'd just put it on and enjoy the pool (and the people in it!) and not worry one-bit about what I looked like. 

Can I tell you this is the best decision and purchase I've made all year? 

Not only did my already-so-vain-ego get a boost by all the sweet compliments I received, but it felt SO good to not be worried in the slightest about all that garbage that fills my head when I am running all over the pool in a suit that makes my thoughts run amuck and puts my focus on the wrong things. 

Instead of worrying about buns and thighs, I just chased kids and had fun.   

There is a first for everything. 

Now, where are those almonds?

Hallowed Places

There was a time when the empty places of life were scary to me.

Now, in a time when busyness reigns and cluttered thoughts are abundant, I find comfort in a little peace and quiet. I find myself seeking out hallowed places.

It could be on a walk in the woods, or in my room in the dusky-blue hours of morning.

These quiet times are few and far between right now. So I am searching for them as I walk in the noisy hallways of life....

The shuffling of kids, the visiting of friends, the caring for others...I wouldn't trade all these things for all the coffee in Colombia.

As a matter of fact being busy has been a blessing of sorts because not all of life has been easy.

The Mister and I have made some big changes this month as we said goodbye to our church family and begin a journey to a new place of worship. It was a difficult and painful decision, but one we feel certain is right for our growing-older family.

On the heels of this big change, I'm about to experience the flip-side of what I have done to a handful of friends six-times over: my dear friend is moving. 

She's been a gift in this season - just when I needed her most - and I now get to experience what its like on the opposite side of the moving van.

To say that I'm sad is...not enough.

But instead of fretting, I've tried very hard to be grateful for the people and things I've been given...if only for a time.

Still, I'm selfish enough to want more...

This week I have two extra kiddos in the Little Yellow House on the Hill. A six-year old and a three-year old. They are precious, and a big reminder that the babies we love grow quicker than our hearts and minds can comprehend. This summer is the last one of my Elementary school-children years. The Boy reminded me that there were only 5 summers left until he graduates high-school.

Five summers...and this ones half done.

In the midst of all this full and busy time, I've had a knee injury that just won't heal. I've been irritated that (among other foot injuries) this has slowed me down. But its also made me set aside workouts for things of more importance... for making breakfast, and choosing conversation...for friendships and sharing life with those who want me in it.

Love, Family, Friends, Church, Children, Health,

Gifts.  Hallowed places.

May I always choose them first....

Matthew 6:33