Friday, October 05, 2007

Kellie vs. Coffee Table

I woke up grumpy this morning.

I worked out and felt better, but was still a tad grouchy.

I went shopping.

I spent money.

I felt better.

Sick huh?

I bought a few fall decorations for my house. (Yes Lara! The minimalist; the Clean Counter Queen bought decorations! Proud of me?)

The truth is that although the desert in the fall-time has a beauty of it's own, I am missing the colors of fall.

I decided I needed some fall color in my house.

When I got done with my shopping the kids and I were all hungry, so I just left all the orange colored leaf garlands and pumpkins and table linens sit in their bags on the counter.

We had some lunch and I wiped down the counter and decided to take a few minutes to get caught up on a blog or two.

I had just clicked over to June, when the phone rang. I hate not doing "something" while I am on the phone, so while I talked I pulled out my decoration's from their bags and started to remove price tags and get things ready.

I bought 3 fake pumpkins in various sizes. They were pretty neat because they look very real and were very cheap.

Finishing my conversation, I hung up the phone and I walked across the room to set the pumpkins on the fireplace hearth. I arranged,, and rearranged and decided that I liked them over to the right side instead of the left. I stepped back, decided it was good, turned around and ran right into the coffee table with my shin. Hard.

It has been almost two hours and there is some swelling with the exception of the indentation of where the table edge met my shin bone.

Let's just say that the words that came out of my mouth were not any where near sparklefraffle.
Actually, for the first few moments I couldn't speak because I was certain that later today I might have to get my leg cut off. Then, maybe, I could get out of running the 10 miler with my brother 16 days from now.

Which, by the way, he invited practically every cop on the force to run with us. One of whom is ACTUALLY a runner!

So, here I am writhing on the couch, holding my leg, in absolute pain. Pain a whole lot worse than childbirth with an epidural, and I am thinking that this just might be my "good reason". I mean, having to have a leg removed because you walked into your coffee table might be good enough reason NOT to run 10 miles with a bunch of police and professionals, right?


But then I start thinking how everyone would be like, "Kellie, what happened to the leg? I always thought you had two!"

And my answer would have to be, "Well I was reading blogs, and decorating, and talking on the phone, when I got into a huge fight with my coffee table and...and it took my leg."

It was several minutes before the intense pain went away. I gingerly got off the couch and walked to the fridge to find an ice pack. The ice wasn't good because the pressure on the shin was too much. As the pain went away I realized that I probably wasn't going to lose my leg.

It's just as well.

Having to tell someone that you lost your leg from running into your own coffee table wouldn't be half as gratifying as running 10 miles and dusting your own little brother in front of all his fuzz fellows.

That thought made me feel darn right good.

Gotta go! All these fall colors make me want to bake.

La Vida Dulce!


Amanda said...

Yeah, it's one of those days for me too...and now I'm going to steer clear of my coffee table!

June Cutoff Cash said...

Oh, you poor thing. I doubt "sparklefraffle" would be my choice word, either, in that scenario.

Do you feel better now? And what did you bake?

I feel somehow responsible because you were trying to look at my blog, which isn't that riveting. Not riveting enough to lose a limb over.