Monday, June 02, 2008

The Gambler

Do you remember that old Kenny Rogers song The Gambler?

"You got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em..."

Yes! That's the one.  I knew you'd know it!

Well this weekend The Mister and I made a little wager. 

A $20 wager.

For the record,  I 'm gonna win.  But isn't gonna be easy.

Several weeks ago, in the interest of keeping it real here on the blog, I decided to go on a bloggers limb. I posted this post about my struggle with body image and how I got from there to here. 

Today, when it comes to feeling comfortable in my body and treating it well, I do pretty well. But getting here has been hard...and it didn't happen overnight.

I also don't think this is an issue I will ever be able to wear the "Been There, Done That" t-shirt. It will always be a battle of the mind. I think it's every women's battle to some extent. Especially in today's culture.

A couple weeks ago I read Phillipians 3:19:
Whose end is destruction, whose God is their belly, and whose glory is in their shame, who mind earthly things.)
The author of this verse (Paul) is talking about the "enemies of the cross of Christ". 

This verse struck a chord with me because I am not an enemy of the cross of Christ, but in many ways I feed a god of my own kind: The Scale.

Gone are the days when weighing myself was an compulsive obsession, but I still weigh myself more than I ought. I give way too much thought to a number when that number is not who I am. 

(As a side note, there was a time many years ago that The Mister got rid of our scale, but after about a year I bought a new one.)

I will confess that I still weigh myself several times a week.  Even though I have hovered around the same healthy weight for a long while.

So that's the back story, and it's how The Wager came to be. 

This weekend I was skimming through  The Best Life Diet by Bob Greene.  I'm not reading it to follow his diet plan, but I had heard that there were some tasty, quick and easy recipes in this book that were high in fiber. We have a child with fairly severe  IBS, and keeping up high fiber intake in a 10 year old takes a lot of effort. I needed some ideas.

One of Bob's non-food related recommendations is that you get off the scale. In fact he encourages his diet plan participants to step on the scale to get a starting weight; then step off for a full month.

After considering this idea for a couple of days I shared the excerpt with The Mister and asked if he thought I could do it: Go a whole month without weighing myself.

He smiled, did a cute little chuckle like he was contemplating his answer, and surprised me when he said, "No."

So I bet him twenty bucks that I could.

We both walked to the bathroom and I weighed myself one last time. Then I put the scale away, and we shook hands and sealed our deal with a kiss.

I won't weigh again until July 1, 2008.

I am not sure if I will post much about this, but I might. Especially when I am already surprised about how much I think about weighing myself. 

It was my second thought this morning (coming after my first thought, which was "I need coffee.") 

I bet I spend more time thinking about this than I realize. 

When it comes to the scale, I think it is a great tool. I have a 5 pound spectrum that I know is a good weight for me. I highly doubt I will over-reach the top end of that spectrum in a month. But even if I do, when it comes to the scale, it's there to serve me, not to serve it

When a number dictated by a small white box takes my focus from more important matters, "You gotta know when to walk away, and know when to run."


mer said...

You can do it! I know you can!

So...tell me how you're going to spend your $20 next month??


Anonymous said...

What a great challenge: a fast from the scale. I hope God reveals some amazing things to you.

Michelle@Life with Three said...

Absolutely right -- good for you! It's just a number and does not define who you are. You can do it!

C D said...

Good on ya!


Chel said...

I am the ULTIMATE problem child when it comes to body image. My husband hid the scale for a long time before I bought a new one. And I'm horrible about worrying about the number rather than about how I feel. Good luck. May your month off be good.

Janel said...

You are going to be fine! I just know it! Lunch - you need to treat yourself and a friend to a great lunch with that $20!

Great reminder.