Deep Thoughts from the Dentist's Office

Hey all - this post was hastily written this morning...Its been a busy week, and its certain to get busier, so I'm going to post, lest I lose the last of my lingering readers. xoxo

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The bad news is that I'm sitting in the waiting room of the orthodontists office.

The good news is that they now have wi-fi!

My head is spinning with all the activity of last weekend. The Girl and I started with a Royal Wedding and then I shipped both babes out for a weekend of camps and fishing.

I have to admit that while I enjoyed time alone with The Mister, I suddenly realized we've come to the time we knew would come -- its just come too soon.

Who knew a decade ago, when I would have begged for a weekend sans kids, that there would come a day when having both kids gone for 48 hours would cause such heartburn.

The Mister and I were awesomely aware that this course of raising children is quickly running short. What seems like a marathon when the hospital-nurse hands you a bundle and sends you on your way is a sprint. Don't even try to catch your breath.

It's going too fast. I don't like it at all.

I guess I don't mind sitting in this waiting room as much as I thought. Because it means I've got kids in my nest and under my wing. Not to mention emptying my pocketbook.

I get asked (a lot) if spending all my time with the kids drives me crazy. "How can you homeschool and be with them all day long?" they ask...

The truth is we do have a lot of quantity time around these woods - and it isn't always peaches and cream. But quality is born of quantity...and even I'm surprised to realize I'm selfish enough to still want more.

I've only been a parent for 13 years. I'm still learning, but I know enough to understand I'm working myself out of a job.

As I enjoyed the blessing of an uninterrupted weekend with The Mister, I could easily see that soon it will be just him and me - every night a date night should we choose...and realized I don't regret one second of time spent with these kids.


- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Parenting a Teenager: Can't Get Away With Anything

Sitting down this morning to discuss the school agenda for the week, I informed the kids of their assignments.

We began with highlights of the history assignments, going over geography and timelines. I explained that this week they will continue to study Ancient Greece, reminding them that they should take note of the prominent character of the times, such as Hippocrates, Pythagorus, Socrates, and Plato.

I made note that there wasn't a ton of reading (of the text) this week and told them they would need to "look up men on the internet."

To which the 13 year-old replied, "Uh, mom, don't you think that's a little inappropriate."

It's going to be a long week.

History

Last weekend we took a little road trip to Williamsburg, Virginia.

One of the exciting parts was taking the ferry across the James River.

My kids had never been on a ferry.

If you haven't been to Williamsburg, its a living history extravaganza.

Volunteers are given a part to play and they very rarely came out of character. Their knowledge of the time period was amazing.

Speaking of history...

The kids and I went to see Toy Story 3 yesterday...and if you happened to have a pre-school/toddler boy-child when the first movies came out a decade ago...bring your tissues.

I'd been reading tweets and blogs that mom's across the nation were crying into their Milk Duds by the end of the film.

I took heed to the warning, but I kind of wondered why?

Well, as the plot goes the toys are owned and loved by Andy, but he is 17 now and headed to college.

The Toys have had their day.

The bloggers were right, I did get misty...

Why? Well, my son, The Boy, who will be thirteen years old in 89 days (not that I'm counting or anything) had that green dinosaur with the missing tooth, who always seemed to be on the floor and under my foot. He carried his hard-plastic Buzz Lightyear, with his retractable wings and noisy beeps and whistles, with him everywhere. For two years Buzz traveled with us to restaurants, church, the zoo. 

To infinity and beyond, really.

Old Buzz was buckled into seat belts, and left on the counter of the bathroom while The Boy took a bath. 

He was a big part of that little boys life. 

As a result, he was a big part of mine. 

That was eight or nine years ago. It feels like yesterday.

The movie reminded me of a special time in The Boy's life, when everything was about imagination and exploration and wonder...a time of chubby fingers and clumsy steps.

I loved that stage.

And I love this stage.

But they are very, very different. Both wonderful, not really comparable.

So why does the movie make this mama cry?

Because its family history...The Boy, Buzz Lightyear, and me... 

Two Words: Choose Courage

Parenting well,

My desire.

Letting go,

It's hard.

Trusting others,

Harder still.

As babies,

Held close,

Under wing,

On breast.

Always near.

But kids 

Grow upward,

and outward,

and independent.

Healthy. Good.

Time's come.

Dreaded most.

Feelings rule,

Need prayer.

Sending Girl,

To camp.

Two days.

Only two.

She's Excited, 

Happy, Nervous. 

Not afraid.

Not Afraid.

I am.

This fear,

Not hers.

My baggage.

My experience.

Never mentioned,

On blog,

I'm survivor,

Many years.

Sex abuse.

Words look

ugly here.

Truth is,

Ashes - Beauty. 

My story.

I'm OK.

Worked hard,

Twenty-Years.

Healthy, Happy.

Grateful. Loved.

Much support.

Even so,

Some times,

Fear reigns.

Robs joy,

Steals focus.

Tempts me,

To despair.

Lies dormant

for awhile.

A week.

A month.

A year.

Wakes up,

Sneaks in,

Takes over.

Brown eyes.

Tender heart.

Innocent face.

Bring back

Irrational desire

To protect.

God Loves,

He protects.

He holds,

Them. Me.

Under wing,

On breast.

Always near.

Little girl,

Have fun!

Be free!

Don't fear.

Trust God.

Experience life.

Climb trees.

Eat smores.

Laugh hard.

Make friends.

Sleep well.

Come home.

Ask to

Go again.

I'll pray,

And trust.

Walk proud,

Face fear.

In courage.

Choosing life.

Really living.

Checking In

I've been a bit preoccupied this week.

First, The Boy has been sick since Sunday. I thought it was just a head cold because it started with just a mild sore throat, but no fever. Then yesterday he woke up with a cough and lots of congestion. Still, no fever.

Today, the fever has come.

I'm praying no body else catches our bug.

Second, my embroidery machine arrived on Monday! Which is why it has been quiet here for the last 48 hours. I have been taking my free moments throughout the day to learn this new machine.

Oh! He's magnificent. He's a Brother and I am just loving all the things he can do.

I'm also thinking about a name for him...because I'm weird like that.  I'm leaning toward Gretchen's suggestion of Clinton, after Clinton Kelly of What Not To Wear fame. I loved this idea because I think Clinton is a cutie. He helps people with a bland sense of fashion to see their full potential. I think that's exactly what my Brother is going to do...only with fabric.

Here are few little "practice" things I have done:

Third, a conversation with The Boy:


Boy: Mom, how come I have to do school if I'm sick?

LVCG: Because that's the beauty of homeschool. You don't have to get behind when you're sick. You can still read all that stuff in the comfort of your bed.

Boy: Ya, but I was thinking it would make me feel better if I didn't have to do school.

LVCG: Nope, you don't get to skip school. You can rest just as easily while reading your history as you can watching TV.

(Long silence)

Boy: Mom, are you saying you never played hooker in school?

LVCG: WHAT?????!!!!!

Hooky.

He meant hooky.

Um, no, I never played hooky in school.

Very much.

Happy Wednesday!

Weekend Recap in Pictures

Good morning y'all!

I have to post quick this morning because we are down to one mouse in this house.

Computer mouse, that is.

And the kids will need to take the mouse to the other computer to do their math.

We had a good weekend....

It started with a "No School" pass, and birthday bagels at Brueggars:

Where he got to open the gift from his sister.

Then I went home and started to put together my first ever Lego cake.

Uh, blue frosting?  It looked good but I just couldn't eat it...I have the same problem with blue m&m's.

Later that evening he had the dinner of his choice: homemade waffles with whipped cream, and "real" bacon...(as opposed to turkey bacon...I don't often dig on swine...Its just not my thing.)

On Saturday as it drizzled and rained all day The Mister prepared the fire pit and I got all the fixin's prepared for the big party.

I worried a bit about the weather, which was completely wasted time...I had forgotten that fire is the love language of man. Rain or shine.

Not only did we have cake and ice cream, but then we had smores.

So the short story? We invited 13 children over to stand in the rain and play with fire. Then I filled them up with junk food, jacked them up with soda, cake and roasted sugar...and sent them home smelling of smoke and dripping wet.

Life is good when you're twelve!

Happy Monday!

Housekeeping and Homeschooling

When I started school several weeks ago I received comments and emails asking if I would share my schedule with y'all.

As a general rule, I have learned that sharing my schedule with others can be dangerous. Often the minute I say I do something on schedule, it will change.

However, I also know that last year (my first to homeschool) I was always curious of how others ran their home and school.

Today I am going to talk about housekeeping.

Before homeschooling I did it all. I enjoy a neat and tidy home. I like things clean, clutter-free, and comfortable. I have a hard time relaxing when I have a lot of clutter.

So you can imagine my dilemma when all the homeschooling books I read said the number-one complaint of homeschooling (after math) was the keeping of the house.

Most homeschooling moms (in these books, and honestly, in real life) had learned to live with a less-than -tidy house.

I, being but a young grasshopper, set my heels in the ground and resolutely announced that "that wouldn't be me!"

Famous last words.

By December of last year I was hit over the head with the realization that I couldn't do it all. I couldn't clean, cook, shop, keep up with an acre of yard, and do school, all by myself. I also realized that there was no shame in that admission.

Something had to give.

First, I needed to own up to the fact that my need for order isn't just about being able to feel relaxed. It's also because I care too much about what others think.

We often have unannounced drop-by visitors (at least twice a week), so my vigilance about keeping things in order was not always about liking things neat, as much as it was about wanting those who come in to my home to think I have it all together...which isn't the truth.

I realized that I had done my children (and quite frankly our family) a great disservice.

Although I was always taking opportunities to teach them value of hard work, I had never taught my kids the value of house work.

Like many things, talking about hard work is never quite as valuable as doing hard work!

In the past my philosophy had been that everyone had a job here in the La Vida Casa. The Mister worked. The kids went to school. I took care of the house.

I liked it this way because I'm very efficient at house cleaning. I had a schedule. A routine. Instead of taking the time to teach my children how to fold clothes, or load a dishwasher, or sweep the front hall, it was easier to just do it correctly, it my way, my job.

Thus began lessons in Home Economics.

I started with teaching them how to use the washer and dryer. They now do all their laundry, from hamper to drawer, completely on their own.

Then we moved to training in the kitchen.

The Mister taught them how to scrub a bathroom.

I taught them how to sweep the floors.

Of course, training is different than telling.

In a perfect world I would like to just tell my kids to do something and have them go do it...and do it well.


Reality demands that I go with them. Show them. And two days later? Show them again.

That is the hard part for me.

Wether you homeschool or not, the value of teaching our kids how to keep a home cannot be measured. It not only teaches them the satisfaction of setting to a task and accomplishing it, which feels good, but it can also help build up our home and family, as well as teach skills they will certainly need in the future.

Oh, and before I forget...I have to tell you that I have learned to live (and work) with this truth: my whole house isn't going to be spotless all at the same time. Nor will things be done the way I would do them. Which means if our plans change (and they often do) and the hallway doesn't get swept on Tuesday, then it doesn't get swept. This also means that the silverware won't be put away the way I like and the pots and pans may have new places in the kitchen (within reason!) each week.

This also means that when a friend drops by, my house may be a disaster, but in the wise words of  Gretchen: we do actually live here. 

So here it is: The Daily Chore Chart. These  jobs are the ones they get paid to finish. They get paid four Monopoly dollars a week. (you can click on it to see the full size)

Yes, I really pay them in Monopoly money...but that's a post for next week!

If you have tips on how to get your kids more actively engaged in housework, or tips on how to teach kids (from preschooler to high schooler) about helping out in the house, or you just want to share your ideas, let me know in the comments!

Happy Tuesday!