Wednesday, December 07, 2005

The Trials of a Pet Owner or If you are a Dog Lover...Look the Other Way

When I started this blog I had no idea that I would spend so much time writing about the family pet.

Kona, our (once) beloved dog, is about to find herself "lost" (if you know what I mean).

Now, before all those animal activist that I call friends get their britches in a wad, Kona is alive and well....and whining at the door to the office as I type. But my feelings for this dog are starting to wane.

What would the doggie experts say?: She runs away because she wants friends. She rolls in poop because it is fun. She brings in pinecones and leaves the crumpled remains all over the living room because she needs something to chew on. She sneaks food off of people's plates because she was never sent to obedience school. And she runs all over you because you let her walk in the door ahead of you too many times and now she thinks she is the Alpha dog. What she needs is firm training, gentle love and a good rawhide bone. By the way, this is all your fault.

What do I say: She needs some swift action with an electric collar.

Last night she ran away again. She was gone for several hours and then came home, by way of the neighbor who brought her home on a leash. She was covered in poop. She spent the night kenneled up...looking very sad and smelling like...well, you know.

At 9:30 this morning in 33 degree weather (by the way, that is VERY cold) I took that little pooch outside and she had a bath. Of course everything outside has already been winterized so I had to uncover the water spout, find a hose in the garage, and find the spray nozzle. My hands were purple, my teeth were chattering and now my house smells like wet dog.

Quite frankly, pet ownership is a pain in the rear.


meh said...

Dogs...they are hard to live with, but at least they aren't cats! (:

meh's husband said...

Suggestion (isn't this just like a man - trying to fix the problem): next time, go to a breeder - not the pound - and get a real dog. It will still do all the things you are complaining about, but you will have spent enough money on it that you don't want to "lose" it.

Kellie said...

This is why I love the both of ya!

PS: Tell Truck that Kona misses that big him! Perhaps she could come to "visit" y'all!